My Favorite Learning Materials for Social and Emotional Skills

While social and emotional skills are not overtly academic in nature, I suspect that most parents and caretakers of littles would agree that when a child is struggling in his or her ability to interact with others and manage their emotions, academic learning comes with greater difficulty.  Add in the fact that early childhood is a time when most kids are concrete and literal thinkers, it is not an easy task to help them to navigate their way through such a grey "subject".  But it is an important task.

A couple of things I try to keep in mind when it comes to helping my kids learn and grow in their social and emotional regulations skills:

• I try to remember that Darin and I are in this for the long haul.  Our kids' hearts are tender and precious and right now they trust us with their feelings and they take their social cues from us.  The way we handle their feelings now could lay the foundation as to whether they will trust us with them later in life.  The examples we set for them in social interactions now is likely to influence how they relate to others as adults.
• It definitely pays off (at least in our experience) to "teach" about emotional regulation and social skills when they are not already in the midst of big and distressing feelings or a difficult social scenario.  My hope is that when Lucy and Collin need redirection and/or correction in such moments, that the instructions I give are already familiar to them because they were addressed in a less escalated moment.  Of course, sometimes, we don't realize specific areas that we need to work on with them until a situation becomes escalated, and other times it does not matter how much groundwork has been laid, things can just go badly.  But you get what I'm saying!

Now, for the materials and resources that I have compiled for emotion regulation and social skills!  

Here's what I have for ya!

                                     

1. Ready 2 Learn Giant Feelings Stamps
I found this set of giant feelings stamps on Zulily and snatched them up. The set has ten face stamps, each one depicting a different feeling.  Some of the feelings include: content, nervous, tired, scared, happy, sick, etc.  Lucy and I have an ongoing project with these stamps.  I give her a sheet of construction paper and ask her to choose one of the face stamps and the color of ink she wishes to use. After she stamps the image on her paper I tell her what the feeling is and I have her print the word on the sheet.  Then she and I collaborate on making a list of what kinds of things bring about this feeling in her. Then she and I have fun looking in a mirror and making the facial expressions that match the feeling we've just talked about.  She LOVES this activity, and when we have made a page for each of the ten feelings, I plan on assembling them together in a little booklet for her to revisit as she wishes.

2. Kimochis Mixed Feelings
This is a simple set of cute and quirky little softies that depict facial expressions and are labeled with the corresponding emotion.  They are good for introducing and defining a variety of feelings in a gentle and playful way.  Each "kimochi" is small enough to fit inside a little hand or be carried around in pockets, if that provides any comfort to little ones who are learning about BIG feelings.

3. Mr. Printables Emotion Flash Cards
The Mr. Printables website is so. Awesome.  This is NOT the last time you will hear about Mr. Printables from me!  They offer so MANY high quality FREE printable educational materials.  LOVE them.  These are some robot-themed emotion flash cards that provide another fun opportunity to expand a little one's awareness of emotions.  These may especially appeal to any little boys out there who, like my Collin, love robots.

4. Mr. Printables Make a Face DIY Toy
See, I told you I would be talking about Mr. Printables again!  This is such a clever little printable/DIY project.  Print and cut out the face and individual facial features. The tutorial suggests mounting the pieces on cardboard but I printed mine on card stock and laminated them instead. The features are then attached to the face with brads. Once the piece is assembled, it can be used to show and talk about SO many different feelings.  Children have fun experimenting with all the features and can see how just changing the position of the eyebrows can show an entirely different emotion. I also like that it includes teardrops-was able to use them along with the smile to help my kids start to grasp the concept that someone could cry "happy tears" which can be a very puzzling concept for them to consider.

5. Eeboo Polite Pig Activity Book
Eeboo is another name that I'll refer to often as well.  I love Eeboo products for their beautiful visual design, physically sturdy materials and frequent depiction of cultural diversity, or, in the case of this charming little activity book, diversity and good breeding in the animal kingdom! : )  "Polite Pig and His Good Friends" is a simple coloring and activity book that I appreciate, not only for its introduction to good manners and politeness, but also for the exposure it gives to some basic mathematical and visual-spatial reasoning concepts.

6. Eeboo Make My Day Chart
Another offering from Eeboo, the "Make My Day Chart" is great tool to help little ones start out their day well with realistic expectations and goals.  It is a sturdy cardboard wall hanging that incorporates little dials for kids to spin and select what day of the week it is, the calendar date, the season, current  weather and what kind of clothing would be appropriate to choose.  Children can then use the board to communicate the feelings they have as they start their day and express what things they wish to "try".  At the end of the day children and parents can even use the board to choose a descriptor for how the day turned out and select a reward sticker if desired. This product is set apart from the other items I have mentioned so far because it makes the important connection between social and emotional functioning and an awareness of what is going on in our physical environment and how to begin orienting ourselves, our goals and our decisions according to the calendar.

7. Melissa and Doug Bear Dress Up Wooden Puzzle
This little puzzle from Melissa and Doug has been around for awhile, in fact I believe ours was handed down from my nieces who have practically grown up despite the fact that I specifically asked them not to! : ) This is a great addition to any toy and puzzle collection and proves to be another helpful way to introduce and identify moods and emotions as children can give the bear a different facial expression to go along with each outfit that may be interchanged on the puzzle.

8. The Big Picture Story Bible
I saved the best " learning resource" (in my opinion) for last  When it comes to guiding my children through the difficult work of understanding and managing their feelings, it could be pretty easy to lead them down a path of self-absorption which will not serve them well. As a follower of Jesus, it is my conviction that the best way I can serve Lucy and Collin in this area of their life is to point them to our Heavenly Father and endeavor to show them the joys of entrusting their hearts to Him.  We have several "Bible storybooks" in our home library and each one has been helpful in our efforts to introduce the scriptures to Lucy and Collin. The reason I highlight the Big Picture Story Bible in this list is because I feel that both the author and illustrator did a stunning job of portraying the emotional responses of mankind to God through the ages including joy, sorrow, fear, anger, etc. as well as God's response to mankind. Additionally, I appreciate the way the authors keep the individual stories flowing together to present the Bible as one big story about a great God. A great and loving God who invites them to trust Him with their big feelings, find forgiveness and be made new and whole through the cross of Christ Jesus.

Thanks for allowing me to share. I hope this collection of resources will be helpful for many of you, and if you feel so inclined to share with any other parents who are interested, I'd be honored. Also, would love to hear about any other resources or materials along these lines that you might recommend! I'll be working on adding more lists of my favorite learning resources little by little as I am able.

Xoxo,

Finding Help

It has been on my heart lately to share a little about how the process of identifying Lucy's special needs has opened my and Darin's hearts more and more to seeking help (in the professional sense) for her (and us).

It has been humbling for me to realize that there are aspects of parenting our daughter that Darin and I are not able to handle without professional help.  The amount and type of help we have sought and received has come in many stages and varieties, and I am guessing that other types of help also will enter our world in the future. I shared in this post about our experiences with identifying Lucy's expressive-receptive language disorder and sensory processing disorder and how we found help for her through speech-language therapy and occupational therapy. After about a year of occupational therapy and approximately two-years of speech-language therapy, we were feeling really encouraged.  Lucy was making amazing language progress and many of the difficult sensory-seeking behaviors were minimized.

We were, however experiencing increased meltdowns that were triggered when Darin or I had to correct, redirect or discipline Lucy. If it were not for the presence of Lucy's other known issues, we might have chalked up these behavioral challenges to being a "phase" or consider her to be a "strong-willed child".  But understanding everything we already did caused us to dig a little deeper into Lucy's behaviors. "Conventional" wisdom in how to discipline children fell flat with her (i.e. timeouts, removing privileges, etc.).  She either seemed completely unaffected by these measures or would melt-down to the point that any teachable opportunity was lost.  Sometimes her emotional response to our discipline measures seemed unusual and puzzling, for example when I took a serious or stern tone with her, she would erupt in uncontrollable laughter.  When I would calmly attempt to remove her from an escalated situation, she would become panicky, yelling at me in protest and sometimes become physically aggressive towards me. Sometimes these meltdowns would last 45-minutes to an hour. Sometimes they would occur multiple times a day.  I found myself feeling hopeless and sometimes angry.  I was also at a loss as to how to give Collin the attention he deserved from me when so much of my energy was spent helping Lucy through these episodes that were beyond her (and my) control.  Too often when Lucy's meltdowns occurred, I just set Collin down in front of a DVD, feeling horribly guilty for resorting to that.  I told Darin that I believed that it was time to enlist the help of a child and family therapist.  This was the help that was the most difficult to seek out... I won't dive into it here, but this was the realization that hurt my "pride" the most.

I had to tackle this feeling of wounded pride head-on, because I knew it was a hindrance to getting what our family needed to keep moving forward.  All of a sudden I had a "flash-forward" in my mind to Lucy's early adulthood.  I wondered what the trajectory of our family's life would look like if we  started to get that help right now as opposed to what it would look like if we kept trudging along in isolation and frustration.  I feared that the visible anxieties, stress and sadness that Darin and I felt over these struggles would start to make it harder for Lucy to feel secure in her relationship with her mommy and daddy.  I feared that the progress we'd made since her infancy in developing a trusting parent-child bond would be disrupted. I also feared that I would become too negative towards her and she would pick up on it. I knew that getting professional help for these challenges wouldn't guarantee a smooth future, but I imagined us continuing on the path we'd been on WITHOUT help for the long haul.  I imagined Lucy as a young adult, perhaps feeling disconnected and distrustful of us.  I imagined myself having to tell her that when she was a little girl, we saw hints of these challenges brewing and considered getting help but refused to do so because of our pride.  Pardon me for saying this, but that's crap. For me, envisioning the possibility of having to admit that to my adult daughter sealed the deal.  I hope with all my heart that as a young adult, Lucy will feel close to us... that she will feel safe with me as her mother and might even be able to view me as a friend.  But, if that is not what unfolds in the future, I'd hate to look back upon her early childhood and have memories of myself clinging to my pride rather than humbling myself when the Holy Spirit had prompted me to let it go and get help.  And I am convinced that the "flash forward" moment I had was a gift from God.

Soon after that key moment, Darin and I got a referral from the agency where Lucy receives her speech and occupational therapies and began to meet regularly with a child and family therapist.  We ended up meeting with this gal for about 3 or 4 months and she helped us learn some simple ideas/strategies that we would have never thought of on our own.  Many of these strategies have made a difference in our ability to guide Lucy in her behavior.  Even though it wasn't practical or feasible to continue meeting regularly with her for the long term, I will look back on the time we spent with her as a turning point and springboard from which we began to make strides in learning to understand and approach Lucy's behavioral challenges.

More recently, we have decided to begin a modified "Applied Behavioral Analysis" (ABA) program in our home with a delightful gal whom we recently connected with.  Ruth is the wife of a pastor at a large local church who has parented a child (now age 18) with issues similar to Lucy's.  I began reading Ruth's blog which she launched several months ago, called Connecting One Piece at a Time and while perusing her site I read about the in-home ABA services she offers to families like ours.  This is the statement from Ruth that captured my attention the most:

"I have developed a passion for encouraging, helping and training children who have learning differences, along with their families. I love helping families normalize family life while living with disabilities."

Between that statement and the encouragement I received from her regular blog posts, I knew that it was worth our while to pursue her help.  So we met her and acquainted her with Lucy's specific needs and began the process of hiring her to come and work with Lucy (and our family) on a weekly basis.  We just had our first session with Ruth this past week and all I can say is that I am feeling grateful and hopeful about this addition to the array of help we have sought and received.

Lucy is a curious, helpful, compassionate, sharing, enthusiastic little girl all wrapped up in an adorable 35 lb package.  It breaks my heart that at times I have been so preoccupied with how to understand her needs and challenges and how to parent her that I have been hindered in enjoying her as the beautiful gift that she is.  But now, with the combination of help that we currently have in place for her I feel like I am being given back the gift of simply enjoying her as my daughter.  I praise God and acknowledge that it's His hand that has guided us through every step in this process.  It is so worth it to seek help. And I hope that somehow our story can encourage others who may need help but feel reluctant to seek it in their own parenting journey.

xoxo,

Plugging Away At Preschool

So we are two months into 2013 and our Midwest winter weather has afforded my little sweeties and I a lot of indoor time at home.  We have been plugging away at our pre-school lessons, but it has been awhile since we've done a Before Five in a Row unit (as much as we LOVE doing them).  I have several more BFIAR books on our shelf that I hope to go through with Lucy and Collin before the school year is up, but after Christmas, I was looking at all the gifts the kids received for Christmas as well as the MANY wonderful educational games, books (not BFIAR), iPad apps and preschool materials that we have collected over time.  I realized that while I was scouring the internet every week for printable materials to go with BFIAR lessons, I wasn't making the best use of what we already had at our fingertips. So, during the past couple of months we have taken a less formal approach for our learning times by simply pulling things from our school room shelves and our iPad and enjoying them together.

Here is a smattering of SOME of our favorite things that we have recently enjoyed together:

1. ABCs of God app for iPhone and iPad.  We have had this sweet little iPad app for several months now, and I just adore it.  It addresses letter recognition, writing, upper case and lower cases and highlights a different attribute of God for each letter.  Lucy has mastered letter recognition and sounds, but my Collin is still working on these concepts, so I have him play with this app a lot and he really enjoys it!

2. Gakken Let's Create preschool workbook.  If you are a fan of the Kumon preschool work books, then you will love this Gakken preschool workbook, "Let's Create".  It includes tracing, cutting, pasting, and coloring.  The illustrations are engaging and cute and it includes stickers to put on each completed sheet as a reward.  It is a hit with both my kids.  My only wish is that the sheets were perforated especially for the pasting activities, but we still love it.

3. Sneaky Snacky Squirrel Game. I can't express how much preschoolers learn through playing board games!  Aside from the academic component of educational games, I love the opportunities to teach social skills such as waiting for your turn and learning to win and lose graciously.  Lucy and Collin request to play the Sneaky Snacky Squirrel Game all the time.  It is very similar to "Hi-Ho-Cherry-O" with the added step of grasping the pieces (in this case, acorns) with tongs, which is a great fine motor  skill practive.

4. Over the Rainbow Game.  This is another great board game that my kiddos love.  I am very impressed with the quality of the cardboard pieces and illustrations.  It addresses color recognition and helps to build vocabulary.

5. Eloise Wilkin Stories In the beginning of this school year, I was considering using Sonlight's Pre K 3-4 Core with Lucy and Collin.  While I didn't go with the full set, I did purchase some of the individual books from the reading list, and the Eloise Wilkin Stories treasury book has been such a big, big hit.  I love and recognize many of these stories from my childhood and they have obviously stood the test of time because Lucy and Collin have become quite attached and seem to have made friends with several of the characters even though they are obviously from a different era.  The first morning that I read "We Help Mommy" to them, they were practically begging me to give them some household chores to do.  Score!

6. Bug Games app for iPhone and iPad.  Here is another pre-school iPad app that we love.  It includes phonics, visual-spatial awareness, counting/number recognition and music activities in a bright and simple bug-related games.  Lucy and Collin particularly enjoy putting virtual stickers on the giant leaf every time they complete three activities in a row.

7. The Book of Children's Classics.  I think I picked up this book treasury at Half-Price Books years ago before I even had children.  I bought it because it contained so many beloved children's books from my own childhood that I had to have it and save it for "when I had kids someday".  The included stories that have been the biggest hits in our home are: Corduroy by Don Freeman, Ferdinand the Bull by Munro Leaf, and Madeline by Ludwig Bemelmans.  These books have been a particularly big hit with Collin, and he loves to retell them in his own words, which is such a great learning practice, especially championed by the Charlotte Mason educational methods.

8. Preschool Lotto Game by Eeboo.  This is yet another high-quality game that Lucy and Collin keep requesting to play over and over again. It is also a great vocabulary-builder, especially for kids like Lucy who need extra help with speech-language development. If you haven't discovered Eeboo products yet, then you are in for a treat.  Their games, puzzles and craft kits are so fun, creative and engaging.  I have a feeling that this game is just the first of many Eeboo products to enter our home.

Another exciting development in our family that pertains to our preschool endeavors, is that Miss Lucy has begun sounding out words!  I have been so proud of her dedication to learning to read simple words and I can't express how wonderful of a feeling it was for me to be present for the first word that she sounded out independently.  To keep her little mind stimulated, I created a couple of sight words file folder games.  She brings them to me all the time requesting to "work on her words".  I thought it would be fun to share the two games that I created as free printables, in hopes that they will be fun early-reading activities for others to enjoy with their little ones.  I am totally new to this whole PDF-document-making and uploading thing, so if anyone would be so kind as to test these links out and let me know if you were able to successfully download them, I would love to know if they work or not!

Sight Words File Folder Game

Sight Words File Folder Game 2

We sure have been enjoying our laid-back learning here at home in the past few months.  I hope that these "reviews" are helpful and give good ideas to other parents who desire to have meaningful learning opportunities at home with their preschoolers!

xoxo,

Buddy System

In a recent post I shared a bit about my and Darin's experience of discovering Lucy's special needs, and our process of finding the help she/we needed through occupational therapy, speech-language therapy and family counseling/therapy.  I shared in a fairly matter-of-fact manner about those experiences, and this is something of a follow-up post addressing a matter of the heart pertaining to her specific need for help in social settings...

Any mother desires to see her children (with or without special needs) find acceptance and make connections with friends. Most kids from time to time experience the pain of being left out or rejected by peers, so I have a feeling that most people can relate to my heart when it comes to helping Lucy form relationships with other kids.

The best way I can share is with a quick story. A few months back, I brought the kids to a park for some playtime.  Lucy quickly noticed two little girls close to her age who already knew each other and appeared to have been brought by their mothers for a play date. The two girls were happily playing and chatting together and I could tell by the way Lucy was observing them that she wanted to be a part of their friendship.  While Lucy can ask and respond to many questions and can engage in simple conversational language, she is not able to converse on a level that is typical for her peers. This doesn't mean she doesn't desire to make conversation, so her approach in this situation with the two girls was to physically place herself in between them and verbalize a string of unintelligible gibberish in a conversational manner. 

One of the girls paused, gave Lucy a puzzled look and said, "Are you talkin' Japanese?"

I gave the girl a smile and said in a cheerful voice, "No, sometimes she just likes to speak in her own made up language." 

The girl then said, "Okay," and then went back to playing with her original friend.

Of course the other girl's response to Lucy was completely innocent and actually pretty funny (I did get a chuckle out of it), but this story does illustrate what I have come to accept: sometimes it is not realistic to expect that Lucy's peers will be able to understand how to interact with Lucy in a one on one situation without guidance from me.  

My dilemma is that I don't always want to be a "helicopter" parent hovering about Lucy and jumping into her and Collin's playtime with other kids.  Thankfully, Darin and I HAVE found a strategy that plays a key role in making social situations successful for Lucy and it is nothing more than the good old-fashioned "Buddy System".  

The trick here is to do what we can to find other kids who are a bit OLDER than Lucy (for her that means kids ranging from ages 7 to the "tweens") who might take interest in being her "buddy".  For example, we have a family who is dear to us who has a daughter who is now 11.  For more than two years now, this sweet girl has come over to our house once a week after school to give me a hand with the kids.  Both kids love her and I often bring her with us when we venture to a park or the zoo.  Her presence is really helpful when Lucy is in social settings that would otherwise be difficult for her.  She is still a kid but she also has the ability to see when Lucy needs extra help or guidance and she does a beautiful job providing just that.

Another way that the "buddy" system helped Lucy tremendously is when she attended Vacation Bible School at my parents-in-law's church two summers ago.  While I wasn't ready to put her into the VBS at our own church, my mother-in-law invited us to have Lucy attend their church's program because they had volunteer buddies available specifically for kids with special needs.  Lucy's buddy (a teenage girl)  just hung out with Lucy during the week and helped her participate in most of the activities.  She could tell when Lucy just wasn't "jiving" with the program and in those instances, she would take Lucy for a little walk until she seemed ready to enter back into the group setting. 

And most recently the "buddy system" has come into play for Lucy in an amazing local program offered by Ballet Des Moines called Dance Without Limits (DWOL). This is a ten-week dance class for children with special needs who may not be able to successfully participate in a typical dance class.  The heart of how DWOL works lies in the WONDERFUL helpers who are tween and teenage dancers who volunteer their time. Lucy absolutely loves her sweet helpers and I think she would do just about anything they asked of her.

For those who read this and have children who also seem to need some extra help in social settings, I hope that what I have shared gives you some encouragement and some ideas.  For those of you who have older children who would enjoy being a "buddy", know that there are children with "hidden disabilities" all around you, and I would encourage you to simply pay attention.  If or when you become cognizant of such a child in your circle consider trying to make such a connection with your son or daughter.  Perhaps you are member of a church and are aware that there are children in your fellowship who could benefit greatly from having a "buddy" with them during Sunday School or other children's programs. If this idea were to get the wheels turning in your head, perhaps you could help to put a volunteer system in place like the one at my parents-in-law's church.  I guarantee it would make a difference in the lives of these children and their families.

Thanks for reading and allowing me to share my heart and suggestions with you on this matter. : ) I can't adequately express how "magical" this approach has been for Lucy and what it could be for other's like her.

xoxo,

Loving Lucy

In my first post I made brief mention of the fact we have discovered that our Lucy has some special needs.  I've been going round and round in my head over whether I should share more about that here, primarily because I want to honor my daughter's dignity as much as possible, and there's just something about throwing information into cyberspace that makes me want to proceed with caution.  But part of my stated purpose for this blog is to share what I have been learning as a mother and to entirely avoid sharing how I am growing in my understanding of Lucy and her unique needs would leave out a significant portion of my learning process.

To give an overview of what we have discovered and how we have gone about getting help, I will tell you the the three areas of difficulty we have identified.

It was close to Lucy's 2nd birthday that with the help of our family physician we recognized that she wasn't meeting her milestones in language development.  After ruling out hearing loss, we were able to utilize services though our public school system to have testing done and receive weekly speech and language therapy in home. She was diagnosed with Mixed Expressive Receptive Language Disorder (MERLD) and we began to see great progress with the help of therapy. So I  would say that for the entire year that she was two, Darin and I were primarily focused on learning and addressing her language learning needs.

While we worked to get handle on Lucy's language needs, we came to notice some other areas of concern as she was approaching her 3rd birthday.  She seemed to have a constant need to be in motion... more than an average toddler, for example if we were in a public place with an escalator, she would want to ride it up and down for more than 45 minutes at a time and when we attempted to transition her away she became devastated.  She also trying to eat substances with intense flavors and smells such as coffee grounds, soap, black pepper, and strong mints. Rather than being repelled by these tastes she seemed to crave them and go to great lengths to try to get a hold of them.  We also noticed that she became overwhelmed and withdrawn when we were in settings with large crowds and lots of noise.  

A dear friend who had lots of exposure to kids with special needs, suggested that she could possibly have something called Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), which is a neurological issue that causes people to receive sensory input with greater difficulty than most.  About four months after her 3rd birthday, we were able to have her evaluated at the University of Iowa Center for Disabilities and Development, where she was officially diagnosed with SPD.  The professionals that evaluated her recommended that she receive occupational therapy (OT) to help her learn how to cope.  A couple months later, Lucy began receiving OT and as well as continued speech-language therapy from  a wonderful local organization called Childserve.  I would say that for the entire year that Lucy was three, Darin and I focused most of our parenting energy on trying to understand Lucy's sensory needs and receiving education from her occupational therapist.

With about 9 months of weekly occupational therapy behind her, Lucy has made great strides, and her cravings for sensory input are no longer constant.  Darin and I have learned how to recognize when she is struggling with her SPD and now know strategies to help her cope when the sensory cravings are escalated.  

When Lucy approached the age of four, one more concern began to form for Darin and I.  We began to notice some subtle but real struggles that Lucy seemed to have when it came to social interactions with her peers.  It's kind of hard to articulate it, but it seems that she has a definite desire to form friendships when she is with kids her age, but often times those connections don't always seem to be within her reach.  A lot of times when she is playing with other children, she can't answer their questions or converse with them at their level.  Often the tone in her voice is off-putting and she has hard time keeping her hands to herself which can cause peers to inch away from her on the playground. We also became stumped at home when it came to giving her instructions, managing her behavior and helping her to regulate her emotions.

 Because of these struggles we felt that we needed some suggestions that the average parenting books couldn't provide, so a few months ago we found a children's therapist to advise us. We are very much  "in the throws" of dealing with these challenges at present, but one of the key concepts we're starting to grasp is that Darin and I need to directly coach Lucy and model for her how to interact with others.  Sometimes it involves stepping in when we hear her speaking to others in an off-putting tone and asking her to listen to us say the same thing in a more appropriate voice. It means a lot of repetitive, direct teaching when we're in the midst of social settings. It requires a lot of patience and a lot of perseverance.  

When it comes to the expectations we have for her behavior in our household, we are learning what expectations are realistic to have in the first place and we must frequently remind ourselves that the  goal when it comes to parenting is not to "show her who's the boss" or lord our authority over her but to lovingly provide the structure that she needs to thrive as a functioning member of our family. It can be an interesting balance with having Collin who is so close in age to Lucy, because some expectations that are reasonable for him may not be so reasonable for her. But with God's grace we are learning and making strides.  

This has been a long post, and if you have hung in there this long, let me say thank you!  I hope that sharing our story of learning how to understand and care for Lucy according to her needs might help you to have understanding and compassion for other families who have kids with special needs.  

For anyone who has a child with special needs or knows others who do, I'd like to wrap up by pointing you to a couple of encouraging resources I have found.  First, let me share a website called Chosen Families.  Here you will find links to online resources for several "hidden disabilities", as well as insightful articles and a blog with many contributors representing families with lots of different disabilities. You may notice their badge on the left column of this blog with their link. 

 Also, I wanted to share this Bible Study that has been written specifically for mothers of children with special needs:

I had the pleasure of meeting the author, Bev Roozeboom at a local homeschooling conference this past spring, and after chatting for a couple minutes, I purchased a copy of Unlocking the Treasure on the spot.  I have been working my way through this study by myself, but I can only imagine how encouraging it could be to do this with other moms with special needs kids.  

Well, this post has outlasted Collin's afternoon nap and both of my busy kids are needing some attention so I'd better be on my way! 

Thanks. : )

xoxo,